How many times a month does a lawyer intern have to dig crap out of someone’s rectum with their hand?

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Apr 6, 2024
11:40:13am

Virginia Ute All-American

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Virginia Ute

Previous username: VirginiaUte
Bio page: Virginia Ute
Joined: Jan 16, 2009
Last login: Sep 16, 2024
Total posts: 52,421 (26,613 FO)

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Messages

Author

Time

Need some genuine advice, I’m sure some on this board have been in my shoes

Pepe Silvia

Apr 5, 8:05pm

Those are rookie numbers. Once you hit 360 hours a month then you almost made it

Longseason

Apr 5, 8:08pm

RE: Those are rookie numbers. Once you hit 360 hours a month then you almost

BaseCoug

Apr 5, 8:44pm

This seems helpful

CBaass

Apr 6, 1:36pm

Attorney?

cougarfann888

Apr 5, 8:10pm

Yep, corporate transactional at a notorious big law firm

Pepe Silvia

Apr 5, 8:11pm

Here is what I would tell you. Have a plan

cougarfann888

Apr 5, 8:16pm

And when I say a plan. I don't mean just a " couple years"

cougarfann888

Apr 5, 8:17pm

I second this advice. Make a plan that gives

LINE

Apr 5, 9:09pm

I did that for ~6 years in Big Law. It was soul crushing, but I got an in house job

slappy

Apr 5, 8:18pm

Does not seem worth it at all for SIX years in hell. Way too long

TaysomJimmerEraCoug

Apr 5, 10:40pm

Agreed. I could/should have gotten out much earlier.

slappy

Apr 5, 11:01pm

Are you the exception as a married guy with interests and the other young bucks are single Alphas who are

CLCougar

Apr 5, 8:31pm

My cousin is at Gunderson Dettmer. His advice to you: you can get the

reagan21

Apr 5, 8:48pm

He’s corrected me…he’s now a partner at Gunderson Dettmer. Now I know how he

reagan21

Apr 7, 10:49pm

Goldman?

Iman23

Apr 5, 8:11pm

Need to establish a chain of yelling and find someone to blow off steam on

DKN

Apr 5, 8:11pm

RE: Need to establish a chain of yelling and find someone to blow off steam on

DiamondMo

Apr 5, 8:12pm

You probably also heard how others deal with this. Drugs, alcohol, prescripcions

chismoso

Apr 5, 8:11pm

Is there no other way? That’s got to take a toll on you and your family.

KingDave

Apr 5, 8:12pm

There is no other way.

OmahaOmaha

Apr 5, 8:13pm

RE: There is no other way.

Malathion

Apr 5, 8:18pm

RE: Need some genuine advice, I’m sure some on this board have been in my

MountainJ84

Apr 5, 8:14pm

Sbarro’s is tough. I’d apply to Pizza Hut or John’s Pizza. Way more reasonable

Malathion

Apr 5, 8:15pm

That’s the point of those firms. Make life as miserable as possible for the first year associates.

JohnnyComeLately

Apr 5, 8:16pm

How much do partners make?

lukeskywalker

Apr 5, 11:56pm

Depends on the firm but a lot. There are level of partners too. Junior, senior, equity and managing.

JohnnyComeLately

Apr 6, 7:13am

a lot = 10M a year?

lukeskywalker

Apr 6, 10:10am

Equity and Managing partners at the Wall Street firms can bring that kind of $$

mobicurious

Apr 6, 10:58am

I’m not a lawyer. I just have a lot of attorney friends. There is certain prestige being a partner in a well known

JohnnyComeLately

Apr 6, 11:22am

At big firms it ranges from $600k for first year partners to tens of millions.

Senora Featherbottom

Apr 6, 10:32pm

Work out consistently. Even if just for 20 minutes. Realize when youre fatigued

cougfanz

Apr 5, 8:18pm

Paragraph 3 is a great and misunderstood point. Complain to no one at the firm.

gwalker

Apr 5, 10:33pm

Very correct. True in investment banking as well.

Trent

Apr 6, 3:22am

NYC is generally toxic

Skidmark

Apr 5, 8:20pm

While I agree NYC is tough, there's plenty of this intensity up and down the east coast in Boston, Philly, and Atlanta

CLCougar

Apr 5, 9:21pm

V&E has a NYC office and they have a better lifestyle.

MountainJ84

Apr 5, 8:24pm

There are 99 AmLaw 100 firms that will pay the same with better life style.

Senora Featherbottom

Apr 6, 10:29pm

Go to the bank and withdraw all of your money in dollar bills. Pour it all over

Forbidden Fruit

Apr 5, 8:24pm

I was at a ward dinner party with couples the other night. After listening for

DiamondMo

Apr 5, 8:42pm

I’m sad reading this. My advice, not that you’ll take it, is don’t do this

gangbusters

Apr 5, 8:34pm

Leave now. Find a small to mid size law firm.

Jdoc

Apr 5, 8:35pm

Just keep in mind you're getting yelled at by a guy who is miserable in his own life, and plan accordingly

Bob Vance

Apr 5, 8:37pm

And with a little luck and a lot of hard work that could be you!

DiamondMo

Apr 5, 8:44pm

You're probably spot on here. Guys like that define themselves by feeding their ego and bank accounts,

CLCougar

Apr 5, 8:47pm

This is a great point. I’ve only been truly yelled at twice in my career, once by a guy in NY who seemed very successful

Breaded Hamster

Apr 6, 1:41pm

My NY colleagues are startled when they work with us and we deal with each other in kindness and respect and balance

zonacougar

Apr 5, 8:44pm

My advice is to only listen to advice in this thread or elsewhere from those who’ve done biglaw

JollyGreenGiant

Apr 5, 8:44pm

I've been informed on CB that working 80-90 hours a week permanently will gain

Nikomedes

Apr 5, 8:46pm

Share some of these posts where you got this impression. It should be interesting to see,

CLCougar

Apr 5, 8:51pm

Oh, it's not that common a sentiment. But it's there, particularly among CBers

Nikomedes

Apr 5, 8:56pm

Yeah, you made it up and can't back it up. I know several CBers who've worked in the City and not one ever

CLCougar

Apr 5, 8:59pm

Nah, mentioned working a ton while kids are young and then change to work less

Malathion

Apr 5, 9:50pm

Your characterization seems spot on, and not that different from what I experienced working in Philly. I just find

CLCougar

Apr 5, 10:35pm

There was one guy who made this claim. I can’t remember who it was exactly but

Ozymandias

Apr 6, 12:32pm

The phrase that: "working 80-90 hours a week permanently will gain you the respect of your kids"

CLCougar

Apr 6, 1:19pm

He was mocking the other guy who said that. I am fairly confident that Niko

Ozymandias

Apr 6, 2:19pm

Maybe, but OP initially stated he "needs some genuine advice"...

CLCougar

Apr 6, 5:22pm

Every. Single. Field. Is. Like. That. If…

IGlowInTheDark

Apr 5, 8:46pm

This is correct

cougarBee

Apr 5, 10:54pm

I disagree. Even you say there are exceptions. Yes, dues often need to be paid,

dYrtbYkerYder

Apr 6, 5:43am

If you latch onto a company that values work-life balance

donnerstag

Apr 6, 2:31pm

Gonna sound crazy but after I heard this song I dumped a bunch of clients and

Forbidden Fruit

Apr 5, 8:59pm

Put in another year. Collect your bonus in 2025 and then bail. You’ll have a big

Scratch

Apr 5, 9:12pm

Don’t listen to the haters on this thread. Life’s too short to NOT make a bunch

homegrown

Apr 5, 9:16pm

My advice, pray earnestly and hard about it. Find out where He needs you. Today

ImuaKahuku

Apr 5, 9:31pm

Anyone saying you have to work big law to make big bucks practicing law is wrong

vegasnative

Apr 5, 9:45pm

Nope. Working for yourself sucks. Have to do all the admin stuff and you’re

Scratch

Apr 5, 10:41pm

I quite enjoy making good money while having great work life balance. Want to

vegasnative

Apr 5, 11:26pm

I was fortunate to drop out of law school after my 1st year clerkship

mobicurious

Apr 5, 9:51pm

BM me if you want to connect.

Cougstreak

Apr 5, 10:08pm

Get out sooner than you think you can. Leaving BigLaw was the best thing that

gwalker

Apr 5, 10:29pm

Stay away from social media. Put your head down and get the work done.

Boring

Apr 5, 10:30pm

Leave NYC. Seriously. Apply for the main office of a firm in the Midwest, south,

Gustav

Apr 5, 10:30pm

Move to where you want to live and start your own firm. You’ll likely have a

Thrill

Apr 5, 10:38pm

You are brave to ask career / life advice from a bunch of strangers

CoolB

Apr 5, 10:47pm

Most of us bust our butts fresh out of school for a fraction of your earnings

Heath Squashwell

Apr 5, 10:50pm

I joined a tech startup out of college, and put in 60-80 hour weeks consistently

espn2011

Apr 6, 12:47am

I started out that way. I probably would have stayed if I were single, but I got

Jay Kay

Apr 6, 12:50am

Yep and 80% is years 0-12. It feels like a cruel set up sometimes 😬

wisconsincougs

Apr 6, 1:16am

I worked with a lady who was complaining that her teenage kid

bald man

Apr 6, 6:05am

How did she receive that question? Maybe you delivered it in a softer way but if

wisconsincougs

Apr 6, 10:01am

I didn’t have to type on small cell. So it was delivered soft and long

bald man

Apr 6, 10:07am

RE: Need some genuine advice, I’m sure some on this board have been in my shoes

BIG XII Coug

Apr 6, 8:54am

Is your boss Louis Litt?

Blue Panda

Apr 6, 8:59am

Sounds like you’re doing a medical residency, just less hours, Lol.

Virginia Ute

Apr 6, 9:20am

To be clear if he is billing 260 hours a month he is working way more than that.

cougarfann888

Apr 6, 9:51am

Aaw dang. Residency was about 320hrs/4 weeks at about 13 bucks an hour.

Virginia Ute

Apr 6, 9:55am

What if you told someone in Big Law that they need to do

cougfanz

Apr 6, 10:24am

Medical hours are brutal, but at least you don’t have to deal with someone on

Jdoc

Apr 6, 10:54am

Hahah are you serious?

Virginia Ute

Apr 6, 11:07am

I wasn’t aware that you have trained

Jdoc

Apr 6, 12:08pm

My poor naive child. Have you heard of insurance companies?

Virginia Ute

Apr 6, 12:39pm

Perhaps it is fair to say that you don’t understand the legal profession and

Jdoc

Apr 6, 1:10pm

Fair. Objectively though one gets paid way less and works way more.

Virginia Ute

Apr 6, 1:31pm

lol. Oh, if only.

IGlowInTheDark

Apr 6, 11:35am

How many times a month does a lawyer intern have to dig crap out of someone’s rectum with their hand?

Virginia Ute

Apr 6, 11:40am

He’s gotcha there

BYU Grounds

Apr 6, 11:44am

Are you talking about your job or your free time?

CBaass

Apr 6, 1:48pm

They do. And they have to deal with trained legal professionals trying to

Jdoc

Apr 6, 12:17pm

What about a 30 hour shifts every 3-4 days?

Virginia Ute

Apr 6, 12:37pm

How about living with huge legal cases for several years that become a huge

Jdoc

Apr 6, 1:12pm

Sounds a lot like dealing with complicated patients for years and constantly worrying about their death and suffering,

Virginia Ute

Apr 6, 1:27pm

<< Deleted >>

cougfanz

Apr 6, 1:35pm

LOL. Look at the lawyers and doctors trying to one-up themselves over crappy hours and midling pay.

kccougar

Apr 8, 8:09am

I think most people billing that kind of time value bill and double

Jdoc

Apr 6, 10:05am

Just get out. It's not worth it.

MyTwoCents

Apr 6, 10:50am

I've gone back and forth between school and higher ed programs. We've gone from

TailgateU

Apr 6, 3:26pm

I worked at a firm like that. Did numbers like the ones you're doing.

Socrates Johnson

Apr 6, 5:22pm

Really tough to EARN your way to financial goals. Get out now and BUILD something.

Bobber

Apr 6, 5:37pm

I’m a partner in Big Law. I’ve made a few posts like this over the years.

Senora Featherbottom

Apr 6, 10:29pm

If you took the UBE and can get reciprocity in AZ, move out here. Great job...

Big McLargeHuge

Apr 7, 11:14pm

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