Troy, the love and prayers of my family are with you. You don't know me but my mom is a Russell and I believe 2nd cousin of your dad (Steve, I think?). You and I have another thing in common...we lost our daughter Haley at a young age too. As a parent grieving over the loss of a child, I know how hard it is for you. I had a lot of guilt as she died from a preventable accident. The guilt made the grieving process unbearable. Troy, the one thing I want to say is that as difficult as it is, forgive yourself.
Few people understand this except those that belong to our "club". - - a club whose membership we would trade for anything in this world. But, this membership also has one of the most wonderful and cherished promises...we will have the opportunity to pick up again where we left off, and be able to raise our children again during the glorious millennium. Few have such a treasure waiting for them.
Again my sweet brother, my heart aches for you. I promise you that your wounds will be healed, the pain will end, and the void you feel will be filled with love and joy, and the warmth that comes with the sweet and cherished memories of our children.
My prayers and love are with you.