Long story short, when my wife and I got married my father in law broke out 20-30 handguns (his and friend's) and we shot them all. For the wife, the .38 S&W revolver (small frame) was golden. Simple to use, not going to jam, easy to tell if loaded, powerful enough and small enough to pack. The new laser grips are awesome, if you can afford one. Nothing like a red dot on the chest. Plus, the laser is built into the handle so it remains compact.

I'm 6-1 220 with large hands and it is fine for me, too.