I prefer the player/kid ask me first. Ask "what can I do to earn more playing time?".

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Sep 3, 2024
12:38:23pm

Cougstreak All-American

Having a parent come in first often sets the wrong tone unless outlined accurately.

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Cougstreak

Bio page: Cougstreak
Joined: May 6, 2016
Last login: Sep 19, 2024
Total posts: 5,554 (258 FO)

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Messages

Author

Time

I coach youth tackle football and had a parent text me last week upset about their sons playing time. Their son

Nuke All-American

Sep 3, 10:04am

If it's any consolation, every other parent at that game listening to that dad yelling

SJS

Sep 3, 10:05am

The sad thing is that all of the kids can also hear the dad yelling.

Sea Chicken

Sep 3, 10:21am

Yeah that’s ridiculous especially if they’re missing practice.

texbird33

Sep 3, 10:06am

Also, you gave a very clear standard to play more: come to all the practices

SJS

Sep 3, 10:06am

I would kick the kid off. Yes, it hurts him in the short term, but will benefit

byubyu

Sep 3, 10:09am

Stay strong. You're 100% in the right.

gangbusters

Sep 3, 10:10am

it is really frustrating when parents over schedule their kids. It teaches them

BYUheaven

Sep 3, 10:10am

It's a tough balance, because I want my kids to be able to participate in

cougarfan84

Sep 3, 10:45am

We have only had 2 practices with every player there. Two... It makes it very

BYUtka

Sep 3, 10:12am

I loved coaching, working with the kid. Parents...not so much. Always amazed

Parker Schnabel

Sep 3, 10:12am

Coaches are just as bad at times. Many parents have legitimate concerns. Not in

BYUtka

Sep 3, 10:15am

No argument there. Those crazy parents are sometimes coaches too.

Parker Schnabel

Sep 3, 10:18am

Yeah, I’ve had more bad experiences with coaches than bad experiences

stoils

Sep 3, 11:09am

Easy solution. Sign up to coach

texbird33

Sep 3, 2:13pm

Done. Doesn't solve everything, can't coach every team.

BYUtka

Sep 3, 2:18pm

It just bugs me when parents complain yet won’t volunteer their own time to

texbird33

Sep 4, 1:58pm

I couldn't even get a parent to help run the chains at our game last week. 2 days helped right away but I asked 3 who

Nuke

Sep 4, 4:19pm

I make my two HS player sons come to do chains, our HC and some of the other

BYUtka

Sep 4, 8:10pm

WRT playing time, is it justifiable for a parent to ever ask you about it? If so, how should they approach it?

durandal

Sep 3, 10:13am

I'm fine with parents asking about playing time, I would prefer they ask me about it then complain. I find it

Nuke

Sep 3, 10:24am

Thanks. I totally get that would be frustrating.

durandal

Sep 3, 10:31am

As a coach you have to do that. It is poison to a team to let a "talented" kid

BYUtka

Sep 3, 10:40am

I prefer the player/kid ask me first. Ask "what can I do to earn more playing time?".

Cougstreak

Sep 3, 12:38pm

My son has played on lone peak teams and I’ve been pleasantly surprised how

maxpowers

Sep 3, 10:14am

Tell the dad...Your son obviously has other priorities more important than

BlueKarma

Sep 3, 10:15am

Keep on keeping on

coug719

Sep 3, 10:15am

What do you say to your kid if he shows up to practice 15 - 20 minutes early

Beggar

Sep 3, 10:16am

"That's life".

byubyu

Sep 3, 10:20am

I get that but it's frustrating when the coach sets the expectations

Beggar

Sep 3, 10:43am

100% this.

BYUtka

Sep 3, 10:46am

Not just the coach, most leagues have a policy about practice participation and playing time.

SJS

Sep 3, 10:59am

Yep, this burns kids pretty quick. There are lots of ways to get kids playing

morningcalmcougar

Sep 3, 11:43am

The "eye test" is one of the easiest signs of a terrible coach. Bad coaches use

BYUtka

Sep 3, 11:49am

I mean, it's minimum expectation. Extra practice doesn't guarantee you more

fattycoug

Sep 3, 12:37pm

coaches don't care about practice...

EEcougar

Sep 3, 10:28am

What's important is the effort you put into it--not comparing yourself to others

Plantagenet

Sep 3, 11:02am

Sorry, coach’s son plays your same position and the only way he gets playing

Bin01015

Sep 3, 12:37pm

At the start of the season most of my son's coaches handed out a paper with 'Team Expectations' on it..

TheLost

Sep 3, 10:17am

Do you keep a record of attendance for your practices?

BYUtka

Sep 3, 10:18am

I actually do keep track on a spreadsheet.

Nuke

Sep 3, 10:22am

Same. It has been helpful when having play time discussions.

BYUtka

Sep 3, 10:41am

Does your league have a code of conduct policy that all coaches & parents sign?

coug10278

Sep 3, 10:21am

My daughter plays 7th grade rec soccer and the coach plays her very little.

kosmokramer

Sep 3, 10:24am

There is no solution to this. Every single coach has a different philosophy.

777

Sep 3, 10:33am

I am in the same boat. This is the 3rd year I have coached tackle football.

Superman21

Sep 3, 11:18am

Sounds like a great approach. I coach baseball and let's be honest. Only a

777

Sep 3, 11:26am

Back when I coached youth football, that kid sounds like a guy

SJS

Sep 3, 11:28am

This is how I feel about it.

yahtzee

Sep 3, 12:06pm

RE: My daughter plays 7th grade rec soccer and the coach plays her very little.

BYUPick

Sep 3, 10:38am

Go talk to the coach. If you are respectful, I’m guessing you can come to an

Junior Deputy

Sep 3, 10:49am

RE: Go talk to the coach. If you are respectful, I’m guessing you can come

BYUPick

Sep 3, 10:57am

Didn’t realize you’d already talked to him. So now you play the “minimum plays”

Junior Deputy

Sep 3, 11:40am

If there is an 11 play minimum, he should be hitting it at the very least.

Mr Salad

Sep 3, 10:51am

Yep. If he isn't hitting the required play minimum, the coach is in the wrong

cougarfan84

Sep 3, 10:54am

I have an issue when coaches are more worried about winning than they are about

cougarfan84

Sep 3, 10:52am

I don't know about every league, but I know every rec league I have been

cougarfan84

Sep 3, 10:48am

I would let her choose something else for active participation that will allow

Plantagenet

Sep 3, 11:08am

Also frustrating is playing with kids who invest heavily in outside training and

Shawarma

Sep 3, 10:32am

Yeah, Lone Peak baseball is a joke now

stoils

Sep 3, 2:42pm

I agree in principle. I never in a million years would have voluntarily missed

cougfanz

Sep 3, 10:51am

1 Kudos for volunteering. Parents forget the free service their kid is receiving

Forzaitalia

Sep 3, 11:39am

<< Deleted >>

Forzaitalia

Sep 3, 11:44am

The kid plays soccer, and I told the dad I would never punish a kid for playing another sport if they have a game that

Nuke

Sep 3, 11:48am

I used to be a big "practice" coach as well. Then I started to really examine

777

Sep 3, 10:54am

I get that to a degree, I go out of my way to make sure kids have rides to practice if needs be and usually end up

Nuke

Sep 3, 12:42pm

Reminds me of my DIL who was a store supervisor. 19 yr old kid complains he got

Forzaitalia

Sep 3, 11:50am

This is why I said I wouldn’t coach again in youth or HS unless it was at an

coastcat

Sep 3, 11:59am

Actual video of that kids dad

MHallDidNothingWr0ng

Sep 3, 12:35pm

Is there a reason given why the kid is missing practices?

GordonSpieth

Sep 3, 12:54pm

Too many go through life thinking they are above the realities everyone faces.

Accipiter

Sep 3, 1:09pm

Have the dad removed from the game.

Gorum the Old

Sep 3, 1:35pm

What age group is this? Also, practices aren’t that important.

Iman23

Sep 4, 6:12am

6th grade, but even our 1st/2nd grade team practices 3 days a week. Their practices are a lot shorter and are only an

Nuke

Sep 4, 7:58am

Yeah. I was wrong. Good luck with that Dad.

Iman23

Sep 4, 8:06am

I would sit him. It is a safety issue.

Cougstreak

Sep 4, 8:31am

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