You have a legitimate question, one that really made me think and like cougarick the first thing that came to my mind was the attrition after the rape scandal. Yet you've spent most of the post trying to defend the incendiary nature of your post heading. Why wouldn't you just ask the real question that you have instead of trying to get everyone worked up by stating that the defense stinks? Is that how you handle conflict in your marriage? "Why does our marriage suck?" If so, I suggest learning a few basic communication skills and tact. Posing such a question only puts people on the defensive.