My wife the same way. I have helped my kids. My wife and I told each of them that we expected them to do their best. Get a part time job and earn what they can, but we wanted them to graduate and if they come across expenses that they can't handle, we will step in and make sure they are taken care of. At times we've supplemented their rent, bought them some groceries, etc. For the most part, they've done a great job (all had academic scholarships), but we've chipped in as needed.