to be someone who is in chronic severe pain like that, where not even opioids or anything help.

Do you have one of those circulating ice pack things they give you? Those can work really well, especially for ortho surgery recovery like knees.

I know some family friends like that, and it’s taken their otherwise incredibly happy and successful lives away from them. They look relatively healthy and normal to everyone. But they are pushing through that exact same pain you are experiencing, every night and day. They say they try so hard, but that it’s nearly impossible to feel “joy or happiness” now. They also don’t talk about it because all of them have said that they have learned that it’s one of those things in life where unless you have had it happen directly to you, no one can come anywhere near close to relating or comprehending. Similar to have a severely sick, or losing a child. So the convos usually just end up making things worse.

My cousin played professional sports where he suffered some brutally painful injuries. He retired early, finished his law degree, and became an FBI field agent. After a few years he got got shot in the arm and had to retire because he couldn’t shoot his gun anymore. Toughest guy I ever met. Never complained about anything or any pain.

He then a few years later was diagnosed with trigeminal neuralgia. He has had it for about 10 years now and it has slowly wore him down to a shell of himself, and it’s all because of severe chronic pain. Can’t think or focus on things because the pain clouds everything. Can’t even sleep at night, any night, because for some reason, the pain is even worse at night, especially when he falls asleep. For some reason that triggers the level to go even higher. That’s it just pain he says is worst than being shot, having his appendix rupture, breaking his collar bone, all post surgeries pain. All day. Every day. It’s amazing that he can even still get out of bed and try and just be alive and happy for the sake of his kids and wife. Such a great great human and Christlike man. He’s constantly drenched in sweat, no matter the temp, because of pain. Yet he’s always a smiling(not because he’s happy, but because he doesn’t want others to feel bad or make others think about his pain. He is kind and patient to others, and always says he’s doing great when asked.

He has been all over the world. Seen every specialist. Tried everything. Nothing has helped in any way. He says his weekly online group therapy with people around the world with the same rare chronic pain conditions sometimes helps him mentally. But also sometimes makes it worse. He says worst than the pain, is how debilitating exhausted he is 24/7 from the lain. It is the inability to enjoy anything in life, and not being able to provide for his family like he could, or take them on adventures and things like he could, and always envisioned his whole life.

He says the absolute only silver lining is that he has become completely non judgmental of other people’s struggles. Especially health struggles. And has true empathy for others.

I shared this not to make you feel guilty or weak. Your pain is real and insanely hard to deal with. But it always makes me feel better when I’m dealing with some kind of physical pain, to know it’s just temporary, and will eventually fade away. As opposed to my cousin who somehow has to try and live with that same or worse pain every moment.