I'll start.

Two buddies were golfing, and one says to the other, "Hey it's my anniversary today."

"Oh congratulations!" replied the friend. "How did you celebrate?"

"It was actually pretty wild," said the first. "My wife told me I could tie her up in bed and do anything I want."

"Anything?" asked the friend.

"Anything."

"Whoa. So what did you do?"

"Well, I tied her up, called you, and now we're golfing."