you didn't ask my advice. I'm gonna offer some anyway, for what it's worth - of course, you can just ignore it.

I've been through some ugly, lonely, difficult times. Prayer - for myself of course, but especially for others - was a huge help. I like to think it brought guidance. I know it helped me move my mind away for a few moments (often much longer) from my own very serious concerns. And when I acted on any promptings I happened to get, some wonderful things happened - sometimes transformative things. That's not to say my own problems just vanished. They didn't.

I remember those moments - especially when life's so hard I don't really want to pray.

Hang in there, man. Life can be terribly, terribly hard. The Lord loves you - no matter what.