in Holliday. Really nice home. A girl I liked was part of the group - so, I am trying to impress. I'm wearing cargo shorts, obviously.

We hang out in the main living and kitchen area and play some card games and group party games, snacks and pizza, and watch a movie or something.

After a couple of slices of Little Caesar's and a tall glass of Root Beer, I go into the guest bathroom right off the hall adjacent to the living room. Mid stream, the toilet lid starts to slowly move back down. I panic and am unable to stop the flow and end up peeing all over the toilet seat and lid which splashes back against me. My shorts are now soaking wet in the front. How do I get out of this one?

I crack the door open to peer into the living room and find the host friend. After several minutes, I stick my head out the door and then signal to the host friend to come over while everyone else is distracted. I show him the mess and explain what happened. He laughs (a little too loud! Shut up!) and then nonchalantly goes up stairs to his *parents' closet* and brings back down some cleaning supplies and a pair of *his dad's* cargo shorts - which were the same size as mine and a pretty good match if I dare admit.

I clean up and change and then throw the wet cargo shorts into the parents' laundry room! (remember, the cargo shorts are a near-perfect match, don't judge!) Then, I sneak back into the party between rounds of Rummikub, thinking no one will be the wiser.

But, the girl I liked asks, "Where in the world have you been?" The host friend and I hem and haw and try to cover, but it's useless. I end up confessing to the peeiasco, which is met with an immediate roar of boisterous laughter and finger-pointing and then a good 3-hour trail of snickers and jeers, and about 7 soul-sucking months of being the object of insiders-only derision and name-calling.