Kalani and Kyle each wanted to get favorable calls on Saturday.

Kalani bought him a 15-room mansion in Vail, and a beautiful Rolls Royce with a chauffeur included, thinking this would surely win his approval.

Kyle had to do something even better, so he bought him a parrot that had been trained for 15 years to memorize the entire Bible. You could ask the parrot any verse in the Bible, and he could quote it word for word. What a gift that would be to an old Baptist ref, plus it cost a bit for a public employee.

Well, the old ref went to Kalani and said, “Coach, the house is just gorgeous, but it’s really much too big for me. I only live in one room, and it’s too large to clean and take care of. I really don’t need the house, but thank you anyway. And the car is beautiful. It has everything you could ever want on it, but I don’t drive and really don’t like the chauffeur, so I’ll just give them to Kyle. Utah is kinda cheap.”

Next, he went to Kyle and said, “Coach, I just want to thank you for your most thoughtful gift. That chicken was delicious. I’ll overlook your substitutions, sign stealing and snap calls this week.”

“Well sir, it is a home game,” Kyle replied.

“Oh yeah. I’ll throw in a PI and holding call against BYU once a quarter and here’s the keys to your new house in Vail and a car.”