Personally, I'd pick the 4Runner for about every reason imaginable - style, function, reliability, capabilities, resale value, ownership costs, etc.
But if you love the Q5 and what it offers, I get that. Vehicle purchases are only about the "measurables" if the "measurables" are what you are into. Otherwise, it's a lot of preference and "feel".
So, if cost is the same and she has a preference, just go with it.