Reminds me of Steve Buscemi's toast in the wedding singer
" 'Cause you've always been there for me, when I was in rehab, and the time I couldn't find my car. It's Harold ya know, he's always been the dependable one. I've always been the screwed up one, right dad? Why can't you be more like your brother? Harold would never beat up his landlord! But, uh newsflash pop, Harold ain't so perfect. emember that time in Puerto Rico we picked up those two uh...I guess they were prostitutes, but I don't remember payin'."